08 January 2006

Wimmen Lessons.

Maxim has a piece called '100 things you need to know about women.' Its actually enough fuel for some 50 blogs. Some are pointless like ``she's gonna outlive you'' or ``let her win arguments''.

Some are good. Like, ``Most wimen will not have sex for the first time with a guy unless their legs are waxed. If your date shows up and you spot hairs, she's trying to keep her self in line''.

My topic for today, though is. no 67: Kiss her before two dates have gone by or you'll be `friended'.

f.r.i.e.n.d.e.d

hmm. that, my friends, is a very scary word.

It's a phenomenon that you can't get past easily.

If you're friends, then life gets complicated.

If you're just two people, and you make a move on her, then there's two choices. Either she gets made a move on, or she says, ``what the hell are you doing'' or ``er, i think we need to slow down'' or ``I'm sorry, i'm married''.

If you're already friends, then it's like the mozzarella cheese on a pizza (not pizza hut, i think they use cheddar). You know, all sticky, and gooey.

The problem with me is, I have to be slightly buzzed to come on strong enough. And then it doesn't work, cos i probably wont know the girl at all :)

If i go to coffee with her, i just talk, well, nice things.

Damn, i have a problem.

9 comments:

Shivangi said...

You sound exactly like a 'friend' of mine... hmmm...

hickey said...

I dont think you have a problem, i think you need to stop thinking so much before making a move. go for it. you might just be pleasantly surprised.

4WD said...

'friend'? why the inverted commas?

Good for your friend, i say :P

Shivangi said...

Inverted commas because of what your post was about! Yea, good for my friend am sure! ;)

Anonymous said...

are you going to pay 100 bucks for the Indian version? i think its more or less a male Cosmo and the content can be devoured in 30 mins.. very depressing!

The Marauder's Map said...

I thought Maxim was quite ok. I mean, I was actually thinking there's at least some smart-assy stuff to read, unlike Cosmo and other women's magazine which all have such yucky soppy stuff and are obsessed with seducing men to the exclusion of all else. Maxim seemed a lot smarter than them, at least.

Ya, it is sort of difficult if you are friended. Things get a lot more complicated and both parties, yes both, are reluctant to make a move because they're afraid of losing the friendship and stuff. Oh what am i lecturing for, just go watch When Harry Met Sally again...

Ron said...

you poor child ;)

Opinionated said...

I so agree with your post! I learnt the friended truth pretty late in life and as a result had so much to rue! But not late enough. If buzzed does it for you, then you should do what I did. Used every opportunity to get buzzed! You're like my soul-brother man!

IdeaSmith said...

LOL I should be miffed but I found this post funny.